Why I Don't Buy My Husband Christmas Gifts

Before you start worrying about my poor, dear husband, let me tell you this: he gets plenty of great Christmas gifts. I just don't buy any of them myself. We've been married for 10 years. I know other couples who have been married longer who don't buy each other gifts. This is not an article about that. Not at all.

All those years ago when we were newly married, we bought each other thoughtful gifts. But since we had our kids within the 1st, 3rd, and 5th years of our marriage, we spent a lot of time enjoying centering our Christmases around them. I still had a business I was running from home, so - newly married, young children and running a business was a tall order for me. But I really loved making things magical for the kids. That was the fun part.

So I'd go out and buy the things I really thought each of them would enjoy and play with the most.  Just kidding. That's what I do now.  But when they're babies they don't care anything about Christmas presents or even know who Santa is. You know we totally bought stuff we wanted to see them play with. Or lay on. Or drool on. So there I was on Christmas Eve wrapping gifts for every child and my husband too. Filling all of the stockings, making sure we had gifts for all of the family members we'd see over the holidays. Check, check, check. It was hectic, but I enjoyed it.

Then one Christmas morning about half way into our 10 years, I was handing out the stockings and discovered mine was completely empty. Empty y'all. The little girl in me made a pouty face. She felt like Santa had neglected her. I wasn't really even mad at my husband. I decided that the next year we'd only hang stockings for the kids. One less thing for me to do. Really I was just hoping the kids didn't notice that Mama got nada. 

But a couple of years later I decided my Christmas wish list was too complex for someone to just go tick things off of it.  I needed to try things on. I needed to pick colors. I needed to shop. So while my in-laws were up to visit with the kids one weekend, I got this idea. What if we had a date night and after dinner we went shopping and bought our own Christmas gifts?! Like set a dollar amount and bought what we really wanted. Since I can't stand the thought of wrapping my own gifts, we traded piles and I wrapped the things he picked out for himself (I would never have thought of a meat drying apparatus as a gift), and he would wrap the boots I loved (that I tried on in order to make sure they fit). Perfect!

Now we have a new Christmas tradition: date night Christmas shopping. That's two of my favorite things.Very happy making! So even thought I never buy my husband a Christmas gift, he gets what he really wants every year. And so do I.

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You Are A Wicked Witch. Yes, You!

Since it's Halloween, I was watching Halloween-type shows. Well, of course I was! At some point in The Haunted History of Halloween, someone said that the word witch came from the word wicca which meant "wise woman".

Wait a minute... how did wise women turn into ugly, spell wielding crones? I'm guessing because we (I'm gonna claim the title of wise woman here) used herbs and oils to help cure people. I'm also going to guess that some people who were counting on us to cure someone got really upset if we couldn't. "She didn't cure my dying wife! She's a witch!"

Today I have umpteen friends who sell essential oils (and who aren't allowed to claim they have any medicinal purpose whatsoever). Are they all witches? Well, I think they're wise, so... probably! You can now buy essential oils and herbs at Walmart for goodness sake. They're everywhere, man. Are we in for a resurgence of witch trials? Or are modern restrictions on claims of benefits the equivalent? I could go on an entire tangent here about big pharma vs. wise women, but I won't. Hopefully the resurgence of using things from the earth to help us heal naturally is a growing trend with no negative effects and an increasingly substantial following.

Last week I printed out this scavenger hunt of Halloween facts for my kids. One of them said that if you wear your clothes inside-out and walk backward at midnight, you'll see a witch. What?! Exactly who determined that? I'm envisioning some guy in 1692 hastily dressing in the dark and in the middle of the night, watching his lady love in the doorway as he sneaked back to his own home. Probably his wife didn't like that much and declared her husband's lover a witch. Maybe. I'm having a hard time thinking of any other logical reason for that weird bit of folklore. Is this why men who've fallen in love call themselves "bewitched"?

So, what have we got here? Some wise women who help people heal and possibly bewitch other women's husbands got a bad rap, and we've been paying for it ever since. Darnit!

Have you ever used natural remedies? Anyone ever told you that you were "bewitching" or that you must have "cast a spell" on them? Uh huh. I knew it! You're a witch too!

Happy Halloween!

Why We Don't Remember Our Past Lives - Example One

Looking For a Product or Packaging That No Longer Exists

In home-school social studies this month we are studying early colonization in North America. As a fun activity, we are doing quill writing. Unfortunately, we don't keep quills in our house, nor ink for quill writing.

Luckily, calligraphy is still enough of an art that even Walmart had a quill pen with several different nibs all in one package. Still pricey enough that I only bought one. They can take turns! But ink? Not so much. Now, I ask you: how are you supposed to do quill writing without ink? There should be something right with the quill pens that says "quill ink" or something.

Photo credit:
The Morgan Library & Museum
http://www.themorgan.org/

In my head I was thinking "India ink". I have no idea why. (I vaguely recall doing some project with India ink in 7th grade art class.) So I'm looking around for India ink and I can't find any. I can't even find a small bottle of "calligraphy ink". What the heck? I went to a craft store and the only ink was a package of three different colors - about 15 ml each for 20.00. I didn't really want to spend 20.00 for ink for one project. I'm pretty sure Jane Austen never paid that much! Plus, not one of the colors in the package was black.

So I started wondering what I could use in lieu of actual India ink. Then I realized I had some stamp pad refill ink that would probably do.

And then I realized I had been looking for the wrong thing. We have new technology. Look where we use ink today!

I also realized I had actually been looking for a small ceramic stoppered container like this:

Not a modern container like this:

I had to laugh at myself. I guess when you've had enough past life regressions, the memories seem like they come from the same pool as your current life. You can get a little mixed up. I was definitely confused as to why I couldn't find something so readily available in my Victorian life. Or my who-knows-which life that my conscious mind hasn't remembered, but my sub-conscious or super-conscious knows very well.

The point at which I realized I was looking for the wrong thing was when I started to tell my kids what the package looked like that we needed. "It's about this big, white, ceramic..." Wait a minute. We don't have ceramic packaging for anything anymore. Too expensive. Plastic is the thing now. Hmmm... Ah HA! Wrong life!  

So, yeah. Example one of why we don't normally remember our past lives: so we don't look for things that don't exist anymore.  :-)

Have you ever done something similar and didn't know why? Let me know!

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Are My Children Remembering Past Lives?

I'm pretty open minded about a lot of things. I mean, I'm a past life regressionist for goodness sake. You have to be pretty open minded to go with that, right? But occasionally my children say things that take me by surprise and leave me wondering what the heck is going on.

Apparently there are a lot of children around the world who seem to remember things from another lifetime. Their "memories" certainly are not from their current lives. Usually, it's children under six who chatter about things that have happened and people they used to know. This has become so prevalent these days that there are whole TV series based on this very theme, such as The Ghost Inside My Child.

I wonder if it's even more far reaching than we think. What if children are giving us clues to previous lives and we are brushing their stories off or deciding they must have heard it from someone else? I'm sure there are plenty of parents out there who just say "don't be silly" and so their children stop sharing.

My daughter's artwork.
Unrelated to the story, but cute.

This morning, my six year old daughter came into the kitchen with two of her dolls in a toy stroller. One was larger and looked more like a little girl, and the other was a baby doll. Usually, she will come in and tell me it is one of her doll's birthday, or that one of them was being mean to the other one. These are common themes. But this morning, she told a much different, stranger story.

She pointed to the older doll and said this was her baby first, but she didn't know about it in the beginning because that one was just a baby when there was a war. She said that she (my daughter) wanted to go, so she left and another lady took care of the baby. Then she had another baby when the lady who had the first baby came to give her back. My daughter said at first she didn't believe the baby was hers, but then she did and took her back. She then went on to explain that she was buying her 1st child lots of toys.

I asked her what made her think of going to war. She basically just reiterated the story of wanting to go, and then added "but it's okay, I survived".

What makes this particular tale stand out is that women usually know when they've had a baby, right? And I don't think it's typical for a woman to leave an infant and voluntarily go off to war. So... what the heck? Is she remembering being a man from another life who left a wife or sweetheart at home who he didn't know was expecting a child? Could be anything from WWII to some Scottish highland skirmish for all I can guess. Could have been anyone anywhere I suppose. Very interesting.

My younger son's art.
The look on my face after
they shared their stories.

When my 2nd son was about 4 or 5 he used to talk about his "other mother". I was thankful when he told me I was younger than she was (he he). I wouldn't have thought anything of it, except that one day he told me that she set a fire under the porch and the whole house burned.  The boys' bedroom is in the front of the house and looks out onto the porch, so he had few nights of worry about the fire. You know, that fire that never happened in this life.

Oh, but wait... there's more.

When my oldest was about three, I guess, he was playing on the floor one day when I heard him pretend whimpering. I looked over and he had a toy held up to his eye like a spyglass and he was looking all around at the floor with it.  I asked what was wrong, thinking he was pretending something. What he said took me by surprise. He said "I can't find John in the water". John? Who the heck is John? We didn't know anyone by that name at that time and I couldn't think of any Disney TV shows we watched with characters named John. Super bizarre. Plus, for a long time after that, he called every boy that was older than him John.

That one was mild in comparison to the next one he came out with.

A year or two later we were watching an episode of Sponge Bob and suddenly he turned and looked at me with an odd expression and said "Remember when Daddy cut my neck like this?" He then proceeded to drag a finger across his throat. My eyes went huge. "Uh... NO. Daddy never did anything like that" I said. "Yes he did" he replied calmly. "They tried to take me to the hospital, but it was dark and it was closed and I died. Then they digged me in the dirt." As you might imagine, I freaked completely out inside. He was only four or five. We absolutely do not watch any adult TV in front of the kids. They were limited to cartoons and Disney movies. We didn't even have cable at that point and watched everything on Netflix. Where in the heck would he have come up with that?! He's now ten and doesn't remember ever having said any of that.

So that's it. I'm sure I could think of ways to rationalize it all away. They heard it from a friend at school, they saw something on TV, they overheard a conversation. Who knows. These particular incidents sure stand out though. And there are thousands more kids like mine all over the world who tell similar stories. What about yours?

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"Channeling" Is a Scary Word

There seems to be a common theme among people who meditate for a long time, or a lot - like daily for an hour, for a year or more. Something weird happens. They get access to things we aren't supposed to see or know. They can suddenly hear dead relatives. They suddenly have big picture answers. They know the future or know details about people they've never even met. It's so... weird! How does this happen? Do they just go crazy? Or do they unlock a part of their consciousness that we all actually have access to, but have never been taught how to use?

Look, our culture is not about being intuitive and tapping into knowledge we've never had access to before. We're told to obey. Obey laws (federal, state, religious, etc.) that have been passed down to us. We're also taught to fear what will happen if we don't. We're all cruising along in the safety of "this isn't really what I want in an ideal world, but at least it isn't torture". We're all accepting "good enough" when we really would like amazing. We're just told it's not possible.

My point is, we don't meddle in what else might be out there because we have a fear ingrained in us that says what else might be out there (when we're chasing that mystical rainbow) is a saber tooth tiger who will literally eat us for lunch. Only the modern day saber tooth tiger is the potential loss of loved ones and friends and a trip to your friendly neighborhood psychologist for some new pharmaceuticals to take. Or a one-way ticket to Hell.

Edgar Cayce
aka "the sleeping prophet"

Thankfully, today we can look back to the "way-showers" and pioneers (like Edgar Cayce and Jane Roberts) and review the copious helpful information their "work" provided. Also, we have modern way-showers like Abraham-Hicks, Bashar and now thousands of others. If you haven't seen the movie "Tuning In", it's on Netflix right now and also available free on YouTube. It features several well known channelers and the stories of how they got started. It's fascinating.

So, we have this whole pool of people who have stepped out into the unknown weirdness who are highly sought after for their spiritual and big picture knowledge (but also their practical advice). Suddenly, walking toward that strange but beautiful mystical rainbow seems more "okay" than it used to be. I personally am still keeping my eyes peeled for that tiger, but maybe there isn't one. Maybe they don't exist anymore and I'm being fearful for nothing.

A year ago I borrowed a book from a friend called "Opening To Channel". I'm not sure why that seemed appealing to me at the time. Maybe because meditating seemed beyond my reach. I had read that you have to clear your mind of all thoughts. Do you know how difficult it is to not have any thoughts? How 'bout impossible? I tried. But during my hypnosis training and certification I realized all you need is a focused state of attention. That alone is so powerful in gaining new insight. I think it's the same for channeling except that instead of focusing on a thing, you focus on receiving some words or thoughts or ideas (kinda like free association). It's really not that difficult. I think everyone can do it.

Hypnosis is one way to help you gain access for yourself: to solve your problems based on your conscious and subconscious ideas. I believe you also have access to a lot more that people don't even realize we have a name for. I believe we can tap into all of the experiences that anyone has ever had throughout time. Now that is a resource!

But some people don't want that experience, or don't have enough practical knowledge to be able to get to it (or maybe they're too fearful), so they need someone else to access it and pass along the information that's needed. In Victorian times, psychics and mediums were all the rage. Today we think there aren't terribly many that we trust are "for real". And channelers aren't well known unless they have a huge YouTube following or a documentary made about them.

I now consider myself a channeler - though I hate to call it that. I'm more like a conscious version of Edgar Cayce. I put myself into a hypnotic state and I wait for the words, thought concepts and images to show up and then I sort of translate what "they" send me. It doesn't seem weird, because I've already experienced, through hypnosis, the process of allowing information to just show up. In hypnosis we assume it's coming from the subconscious and we're okay with that. With channeling, we assume the information is coming from the super conscious - or the collective experience that all of us have had (and will ever have) throughout all time. Unfortunately, mainstream science hasn't adopted or accepted the idea of the super conscious just yet. I believe it's only a matter of time.

We really need a new word for channeling. Maybe it needs the word quantum in it to make it sound more sciency and less woo-woo crazy. I cringe to use "channeling", but I do it because I don't know of anything better yet.

This process could be so helpful to so many people if we could just de-woo it. Until we think of something, or until science catches up, I'll be over here asking questions and getting really great, practical answers for my friends and I.

If you have a question, please send me a message or an email and I'll ask it in one of my sessions and let you know what "they" say. I'm being encouraged to offer this as a paid service, but frankly, that terrifies me at the moment. So feel free to take advantage of that and ask away now! My friends think it is really helpful (and so do I) and I do love to help.

__________________________________
Resources:

Bashar:
http://basharchanneledbydarrylanka.org/videos/
https://www.youtube.com/user/BasharCommunications

Abraham-Hicks:
http://www.abraham-hicks.com/
https://www.youtube.com/user/AbrahamHicks

Edgar Cayce:
http://www.edgarcayce.org/

Jane Roberts/Seth:
http://www.sethlearningcenter.org/


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Elsewhere: A View to the Other Side

When my parents were 20-somethings years ago, they made a pact with their friends: If any of them died before New Year's Eve 1999, they would come back and show the others proof that there is life after death. They lost one friend in the mid 70's and then my Mom in 1997. My Mom didn't wait for 1999.

A few weeks after Mom died, my brothers and now ex-sisters-in-laws and I got together to "celebrate" my little brother's birthday - as much as you can celebrate when your Mother just died. After dinner and cake and ice cream, we did what we sometimes did and pulled out the Ouija board. We never did anything serious with it. Just "what's your name, how old are you, when did you die, blah blah blah". Most of the time we didn't get anything that made any sense - just a string of random letters or numbers. But this day was different.

Patricia Howard Huber
10-11-1942 to 8-7-1997

I think we had tried combinations of us together and just weren't getting much. I always thought it moved better with my brothers and I on it at the same time, so we did that. It moved. We asked what the spirit's name was. "Pat". I shrugged.  Doesn't mean it's our Mom. Could be anyone named Pat. But when we asked for death date, birthdate, etc. we got all of Mom's details. We were still suspicious. "What are our birthdays?" one of us asked. The planchette easily moved through the dates of all of our birthdays in order. Hmmm...

Okay, so what do you ask your Mom after she's died and you didn't expect to be able to "talk" to her again, much less get answers? I think it was my younger brother who asked "Where are you?" The planchette started moving and I was riveted waiting to see what she said.

E - L - S - E - W - H- E - R - E

Well that sounded like my Mom!

If I know my Mom (and I do), what I think she was trying to convey - short and sweet - was that nothing she could spell out to us would be sufficient for us to understand the complexity of where/who/what/when she was. Incidentally, she also told us that their friend who had died in the 70's was now the grand-daughter of one of their friends. I guess she was fulfilling their pact with that additional info. Mind blown.

So... "Elsewhere" is complicated? I think I got my own glimpse of it during a past life regression recently. I wrote about that regression here. During a hypnosis session in which I was exploring whether I'd had a past life with a friend of mine, I went past my death scene and ended up somewhere else. Yep, "Elsewhere" is appropriate when it's nothing like you've experienced before.

I was in a void or darkness, but not scary. There just wasn't any scenery. Actually, now that I think of it, not even a floor. It's like we were on a plane. Not the kind that flies through the air, but some invisible plane on which we all "stood" just then. Beside me was someone I perceived to be a guide or advisor. He looked like a kind older man, and honestly kinda looked like someone from ancient Greece - robe-like clothing and all. He emanated kindness, understanding, and lots of happiness. In front of me and to my right were a group of souls who were made of white light and had human shapes, but I couldn't make out any features. They weren't scary either. We were there with a purpose, and that was to plan the life I had just seen in my regression.

I knew that we had just worked out all the details of what the individual souls in that group and I were going to do or "work on" in that life. We had all agreed. This particular life had a big lesson in it. I'm not going to pretend to know precisely what that was, but I know it was an option for me and I had decided (somewhat naively, maybe) to take it. So after negotiating all the little details, it was time for figuring out who was going to work with me on the big experience. Just then another light... person zipped up in front of my guide and I. He volunteered.

When I say he volunteered, it's not like he walked up and said "I'll do it" in a human voice or anything. In this place where I was, thoughts are conveyed, but they contain emotions too. So I knew his intention. He wanted to help, and he also wanted the opportunity for himself. He hoped I would allow him to do that. I would say he was anxious, but in that place there isn't really any negative emotion or thought. I'd say he was more eager, but also cautious because he wasn't sure what I would want. It was really remarkable that all this information sort of downloaded into my brain in a scene that probably lasted about 10 seconds in real time.

I remember when he came forward, all of the others in the group looked like they were talking to each other and some of them seemed surprised. I'm not sure why. I don't know if it was because it was something about him, or because they didn't know what we had planned until that moment. I just felt they were maybe a bit shocked and discussing it among themselves as if it were a rare thing. I should tell you, if you haven't read the regression story, that he was a really bad dude in that life. Not nice things happened to me and he was the perpetrator - and that's what we had planned. Maybe that was the shocker. Maybe that's not a normal thing in Elsewhere. Anyway, my guide seemed okay with it and like I said, I felt kind of naive. I was also made of the glowing white light and I felt like I was just taking the suggestions my guide offered. Maybe I was a young soul at that time. I donno.

The only other time I saw Elsewhere was after I experienced another death in yet another past life regression. This was a life where I was burned at the stake. Yikes! After floating up out of that body, I found myself stepping out of a room - and I felt like it was the room where all of that whole life had just happened. As I closed the door and turned to face down the white hallway, my friend (who looked nothing like my friend does today) came down the hallway telling me with great enthusiasm how great I did in that life. That I had stuck to my convictions and did everything as I had planned (while my conscious mind was saying "uh.. yeah, but I died"). I remember feeling like it was going to take me some time to process everything that had just happened and we started walking down the hallway. I didn't look like myself today in that "scene" either. I wasn't a light being either. I don't know who I looked like. Just a young woman with brown hair. Maybe what I had looked like in that life.

I'm not sure why that vision was so different from the life planning one. Maybe the more lives you spend on Earth, the more you identify with your physical self. Or maybe right after you come out of a life, it takes awhile to remember who you really are, and to give up the illusion of being a human. I'm looking forward to experiencing more regressions and exploring Elsewhere. There are lots of accounts from several famous past life regressionist's sessions, but they seem inconsistent to me. I'd love to find out what makes them that way. And yes, it could just be because it's our subconscious mind making it all up. Either way it's pretty fascinating.

Stay tuned and I'll post when I have more info to share. You can check out the past life experiences I've written up so far on my hypnosis website: http://www.timetravelhypnosis.com/category/my-past-lives/

Why Am I Here?!

Can you see your path?

It's a question we all ask ourselves eventually. What am I here to do? What's my purpose in life? What's going on? We read books and get coaching and subscribe to newsletters and youtube channels. But even with all the helpful information out there, there may still be a knawing inside you that says "But what about me specifically? What am I supposed to be doing?" We want to know our purpose. We want to know if we're on the right track. Otherwise we feel like we're just listing - going nowhere. We see no direction. But... you can figure out your purpose and it's really pretty simple.

The first question to ask yourself is: What do I love doing? Or more specifically, what do I love doing that helps other people, or helps to make other people happier?

What do you do daily that makes your heart all warm and fuzzy? When I worked as a salesperson at J. C. Penney years ago, I liked it when angry people came in to return something. Why? Because we had an amazing policy that a customer could return anything at any time for any reason. I loved saying "I'm sorry, would you like to replace it, or would you just like your money back?" Some people came in prepared for battle - expecting to have to justify their return, but an apology, some chit-chat and a refund later and they were smiling as they left the store. I loved that. Any time I could take an unhappy person and make them happy, I loved the opportunity!

The second question to ask is: When you look back, what have people thanked you for, or what have people seemed grateful to you about? I'm not talking about "thanks for helping me move" although, that is really kind of you! I'm talking about something that made a difference in a person's life in a moment when they needed just that little extra something.

How do you help?

When I was in high school, we had a new girl in band. One night at a ballgame, she turned to me and said she missed her old friends and her old school because they were like family. I looked at her and said "I'm sorry you're sad, but we're your family now". I don't even know where that came from. I didn't know her well and to be honest, it felt a little weird because I wasn't one to say things like that. But she smiled, and it was like I could see a little of the sadness slide right out of her. When I look back, there are lots of times people have told me that I said something to make them feel better (years later). I had no idea I had done anything at all at the time. But it sure feels good to know I helped. So, looking back, what do people tell you they appreciate you saying or doing that helped them?

So what are you saying, Amanda? That everyone is here to make everyone else feel better? Well, that'd be nice, but... nah. Not necessarily. You could be here to be strong for the people around you. You could be here to show people strength by example. You could be here to teach people empathy for others through advocating for animals. There are so many possibilities. Look back at your life so far and see if any patterns show up.

Once you discover a pattern, make sure it resonates with you. If you see a pattern of helping animals, for example, but that doesn't sound like something you really want to do every day, then keep looking. When you figure it out, it feels right. It's kinda like trying to analyze a dream you've had. Other people can offer interpretations, but if it doesn't resonate, you know that's not what it means. And when you finally figure it out - ding! That's it! Ha!

Hypnosis = bridge to
your path.

When you get to that place where you're pretty sure you know what your purpose is, you can cement that knowing in with a good hypnosis session. What that does is puts you squarely on the "right" path for you - the one that feels amazing and purposeful. And you finally find that peace that is "I'm doing what I was meant to do". Ahhhhh...

I did all of this completely backward. I did several hypnosis sessions for myself in which I saw, felt, and knew why I was here and then looked back on my whole life and saw the pattern there. This was particularly impactful because one that I saw was the planning of a past life that really wasn't very nice (you can read about that here). But what I saw and felt through this chain of sessions was how we are connected with the people in our lives and how we plan to help each other (for you woo-woo'ers, these are called "soul contracts"). If you aren't "into" past lives, consider it a visualization of your life planning for this life. However you want to think about it, it'll help.

You can read about some of my personal past life regressions, setup a hypnosis session, or just check out info about hypnosis on my website: www.timetravelhypnosis.com

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34 Secular Quotes for Homeschool Handwriting Practice

I remember back when I was in 4th grade, we would come in to class to find our handwriting work written on the board. The first thing we did was get out our paper and copy that poem. I remember the day I came in to find this poem (which I memorized because it was so fun):

I never saw a purple cow.

I never hope to see one.

But I can tell you anyhow

I'd rather see than be one.

I have no idea who wrote it, or even if I memorized it correctly. I only know that when I decided my kids needed handwriting practice, I wanted to make it fun. But I also want them to learn something good for the soul.

So.

Here is my collection of eclectic quotes - from Abe Lincoln to Yoda. Some of them I found on Pinterest boards, so they could have been painted on a wooden sign, or sewn onto a pillow. I have no idea who wrote most of them. Heck, some could be non-secular for all I know. But I like them all and I love the messages in them.  Here they are:


What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step. ~ C. S. Lewis

There are better things ahead than any we leave behind. ~ C. S. Lewis

Mistakes are proof that you are trying.

Believe you can and you're halfway there.  ~ Theodore Roosevelt

You are capable of amazing things.

Your mind is a garden

Your thoughts are seeds

You can grow flowers or 

You can grow weeds.

Life doesn't have to be perfect to be beautiful.

We can't help everyone, but everyone can help someone. ~ Ronald Reagan

Don't wait for sleep to dream.

You're off to great places

Today is your day.

Your mountain is waiting 

So get on your way.

~ Dr. Seuss

What lies behind us
and what lies before us
are tiny matters compared to
what lies within us.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do something today that your future self will thank you for.

Whenever I get sad I stop being sad and start being awesome.

The happiest people don't have the best of everything,

they just make the best of everything.

Whether you think you can, or think you can't, you're right. ~ Henry Ford

If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you'll find an excuse.

Please excuse the mess, we are making memories.

It always seems impossible until it's done. ~ Nelson Mandela

The best way to get things done is to simply begin.

Great things are done by a series of small things brought together. ~ Vincent Van Gogh

Whatever you are, be a good one. ~ Abraham Lincoln

We rise by lifting others.

If you can dream it, you can do it. ~ Walt Disney

Be the reason someone smiles today.

You don't have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great. ~ Zig Ziglar

If you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely. ~ Roald Dahl

No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.

Do or do not - there is no try. ~ Yoda

It's kind of fun to do the impossible. ~ Walt Disney

By being yourself, you put something wonderful in the world that was not there before. 

~ Edwin Elliot

You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step. ~ Martin Luther King

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Collect moments not things.

The best way to predict your future is to create it. ~ Abraham Lincoln

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The Anti-Zen: How NOT To Meditate

My husband has been working late. A lot. I have been with my children every waking moment for about 2 weeks now. Doesn't sound that bad, but every time I go in my room for "quiet time" I hear a knock on my door exactly 3.5 seconds after my bottom hits the top of my mattress. I need some Zen meditation time to clear out my brain or I will go mad. Mad I tell you!

Yesterday was a gorgeous day. Sunshine and 70's - real fall weather. I have been aching for this! I decided I would go outside and meditate, even if it was only for 10 minutes. I made a plan. That might have been my downfall. Because when I plan, I'm basically saying to myself that I expect to be interrupted and that I need to put some blocks up for the children to have to get through to get to me.

I made dinner. I set it on the table. I said "I'm going outside to meditate".

Step one: go outside

After wandering around a little I picked a comfy looking spot under a tree and sat down. My flip-flops were bothering me. I took them off. My back was bothering me. I leaned back on my arms and tilted my face up, enjoying the cool breeze.

Step two: connect in

I took a few deep breaths and tried to find that place where all the little daily bothers and tasks don't even matter. I'm getting good at getting there (thanks to my hypnosis training I think), so it only took a minute.

Step three: ignore distractions

Cars going by. No biggee... I think that may be an ant crawling on my hand. Whatever... Oldest son calling "Mom! Mom! Where are you?!"  I'm just gonna ignore that. He'll see me and realize I'm meditating... I tried to re-Zen. More yelling from the deck. He is not. even. looking for me.  Wait... zen... zen... "Mom! Mom! Where the heck is Mom? Guys I can't find Mom" and oh FOR THE LOVE OF PETE! "I'M RIGHT HERE! DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR SOMEONE TO MEDITATE WHEN YOU'RE YELLING CONSTANTLY FOR THEM?!"

Step four: try another time

Anger = not meditation. Meditation over. My son apologized and said "I couldn't see you and I was worried." Ding! Aaaaand there's the guilt. Yep. I just yelled at my son, while I was supposed to be meditating, and he was only concerned about me.

I feel like the anti-spiritual. But I will persevere! Some day I will be the most astonishing meditator - able to bliss out and tune out in the face of mass chaos.

Some day.

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"The Event": What Is It?

I guess it was a couple of years ago - maybe three - that I first heard about The Event. No, I'm not talking about the TV show, I'm talking about something you'll find in fringe culture that is becoming not so fringe. As far as I can tell, The Event is a turning point in human history where things will get dramatically better for all humankind. Where we will all know for certain that we are all a part of each other and won't be able to tolerate injustices for anyone in the world. Technology beyond our wildest imaginings and beings we didn't know existed will all be known to us along with a lot of other stuff. And apparently it will happen for most of us at once - like a flash of light.

I think I stumbled upon The Event while researching hypnosis training courses. One of Dolores Cannon's QHHT (quantum healing hypnosis therapy) trained practitioners posted this video in which Ron Head describes The Event under hypnosis. There are now five parts on this topic. He starts by saying uncomfortable times are coming which will bring about change (I don't know about you, but I think we're seeing this right now). Don't worry though, the world won't be destroyed. Apparently, it isn't allowed. "Do not go into fear... Stay in anticipation" he says. The first of these sessions were recorded in 2013 and early 2014.

Also in 2013, an announcement came at a channeling event. Bashar, channeled by Daryl Anka doesn't normally give any predictions. He says things are always in flux and only probabilities are available, and only for that particular moment that you ask a question. However, at this particular event, associated entities came through and gave the following prediction:

In your year of 2016 ..., a transformational point in the fall of your year of 2016 prior to your country’s new coming election EVERYTHING will change!

...This transmission will be given 3 times over the course of this event. In your upcoming fall of 2016 EVERYTHING will change! You are crossing a threshold that you have been preparing for many thousands of years. We are privileged to be the ones to announce to you this upcoming threshold in your collective consciousness, for we relate to you as a collective consciousness and read in your collective consciousness this upcoming change of great transformation. In your upcoming fall of 2016 EVERYTHING will change! You have 2 ½ years to express yourself in the way that is most in alignment with your being, for after that threshold EVERYTHING will change.

So are these two related? There are a couple more hints that something is up. There's a guy named Ed Dames who was a Remote Viewer for the U.S. military. He says a team of remote viewers has seen an event that changes the world - in his view, not for the better. The part I remember the best is when he describes them seeing a flash of light in the sky, and then all of the soldiers on the battlefield just lay down their weapons and go home. Sounds good to me, but Dames thinks the flash is a solar event which will bring about death and destruction. They don't call him Dr. Doom for nothing. You can watch his full length video all about what he thinks will be the "Killshot" at this link.

There is a project going on with another group of Remote Viewers called the Time-Cross project. Remote Viewers are tasked with viewing the event(s) that are the biggest news stories for the following month. So far they have been eerily accurate. I am anxiously awaiting what they have viewed this month (September) about events in October. Will they see The Event?

Yet another reference to an event which would bring a change to our world was mentioned in Dolores Cannon's Convoluted Universe Book I. I wish I had the book here to quote directly from it, but I don't (I checked it out from the library). I do remember reading an account of someone under hypnosis who talked about the second coming of Christ not being a person, but a consciousness. This is similar to what Ron Head describes in the youtube videos above.

Can you imagine how much our world would change if we suddenly all realized that we are worthy, that we are all connected, and that there is more than enough to go around if we all just work together? If we had technology like free energy? If we didn't all have to work so darn hard? Is this what The Event is? Somehow I think this is just putting it too simply. Somehow I think there will be much more to it. At least I would hope so.

In order for the whole world to change, a whole lot more of us need to wake up. And the ones who think they are already awake have room to feel what they already know on a deeper level. If there is an event coming in the next month where we see a big flash and the love, understanding and knowing descends upon us, things are going to change really quickly. I don't know about you, but I am SO in. Even if it doesn't happen in a great big exciting event, but a gradual awakening, I'm still in. Bring it!

My Ghost Story

Halloween is coming. I'm already binge watching any paranormal shows I can find that I haven't already seen. My favorites right now are the ones that deal with investigating ghost stories. When I was little I was terrified I might see a ghost. When I was 14, I actually saw one.

My brother playing pinball
in my uncle's basement.

During the winter of 1980-something we were in Pennsylvania visiting my relatives. I know that I was 14 because I had my drivers permit and my cousin, Kara, who was a year older than me, didn't (different rules in PA than here I guess). Since she always got to do everything first, I was kinda excited about that. We went to stay with my uncle who lived in a wooded area. The house was pretty isolated. My cousin's bedroom was downstairs in the walk-out basement. The basement also contained a bathroom, a nice living area, a bar, and a storage room. Ooh! And a pinball game! I stayed in Kara's room with her and the rest of the family stayed upstairs.

Since Kara's room was toward the back of the house, she only had one small window (the size of a loaf of bread) toward the top of one wall. The window was at ground level outside. Since we were in the woods, there was no light coming in. She had one of those lamps where you could adjust the light so it was very low, like a night-light, and she slept with that on.

One night I woke up because I was really hot. The bed had this heavy velvet coverlet and I guess I wasn't used to the temperature. As I went to throw off the coverlet, I glanced up and saw my cousin standing near the doorway with her robe on. I rolled over and tried to go back to sleep. But something was bugging me. I didn't hear her moving around. The bathroom was right across the hall, so if she was headed that way I would have heard something. If she was coming back, I would have heard the toilet tank refilling, right? I thought maybe since she saw me moving around, she was being very still and trying not to wake me. So I kept my eyes closed and waited.

This is similar, but it
was Burgundy with
wider sleeves.
Photo credit:
www.gcv.org

Then a story my Dad told me once sprang to memory (I'll save that one for another time). I looked over, and Kara was sound asleep beside me! I'm sure you can guess how terrifying that was. I could not bring myself to look back toward the door. I grabbed the discarded coverlet and threw it over my head like the scared little kid I was. I'm pretty sure I passed out from fear (or from a lack of oxygen, or heat stroke) because I didn't wake up until morning.

When it's daylight stuff doesn't seem as scary. I looked up at the window considering whether any light could have come in and played tricks on me. I looked behind the door for anything that might look like a person - a poster, some shadows, anything. Nada. Finally I ran upstairs (my cousin was already up there) and asked my Aunt if she had hung anything on the door that she had taken off that morning. She said no and asked why. I told her, but my two younger cousins were in the room, so the conversation died. Pun intended.

Apparently
civil war era.

When I thought back to what the person looked like, I realized it wasn't a robe, but maybe a dressing gown over a floor-length white garment that poofed out a little bit at the bottom. She had dark hair that was pulled up and back. She wasn't staring at me, just still and staring straight ahead. It was almost like a still picture, only life-sized and 3-D. But then, all this is from a glance that lasted maybe a second. My rational brain mistook the ghost for my cousin, because my cousin had short, dark hair at the time. And since it was winter, I assumed she put her robe on. But who puts a robe on in a warm house to walk 10 steps across the hall?

It turns out there have been a number of weird things that have happened in and near their house over the years (I found out many, many years later). My aunt has actually seen a little old man leaning over her in the middle of the night. My aunt and uncle have woken up in the middle of the night to find all of the lights on in their room. My Dad even swore he heard my cousins playing at the back of the house when no one was home. But the weirdest thing I heard them talk about was a bag of warm McDonald's french fries that they found in the bottom of their coat closet one day. I should mention that the nearest McDonalds at the time was a 45 minute drive away. Warm? Freaky!

Apparently my Uncle's house sits on or near the site of an old saw mill. I don't know much about it, but I know they have a wall full of artifacts decorating their basement including a large saw blade, various tools and even some old spectacles. Do the folks who used to live or work there still hang out in my uncle's house? Maybe. You could probably come up with logical explanations for all the strange happenings - even my ghost sighting. I have stayed there since and nothing else weird happened. All I know is this: I would never have slept in that house at age 14 if I had suspected it was haunted. But it's kinda cool that I have my own ghost story to tell.

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The Ghosts of Halloweens Past

I know we still have another day to go until it's even Fall, but I cannot wait! Fall is my favorite time of year (maybe because my birthday falls in... Fall), and I really love Halloween. But Halloween today is waaaay different from Halloweens gone by and I dug up some pictures to illustrate the differences.

Back when I was trick-or-treating in the late 70's/early 80's, I don't remember getting to pick what costume I'd get to wear. In fact, if I don't have a picture of one of my costumes, I don't even remember it. I mostly remember huge piles of candy and being told to let my parents check the candy before I ate any. We were not allowed to eat any candy while we were out trick-or-treating (which we did by ourselves by-the-way). Also, Mom said to tear the candy bars into pieces before biting into them. I don't remember if I was tearing my candy bars or not, but I remember tearing through our neighborhood with my friends and setting the goal of hitting every single house before our time was up.

Our costumes were almost always home made. The exceptions were costumes mom acquired through extreme bargains, or those handed down from somewhere. I think this picture is the only example of real costumes I have. My little brother is on the right in chaps that I really think used to be my dads from when he was little. The rest of the costume is either borrowed or we already had. My dad used a burned cork to make his mask. Just like the old days (I guess). My brother's best friend (and also our next-door neighbor) is in our clown costume that I'm pretty sure every one of us wore at some point. That hat is from one of my dance recitals. Shhhh... don't tell him! Sorry Micah.

This is one very unhappy six-year-old witch. Don't get me wrong, I was super excited to be a witch that year. But it was cold out and my Mom made me wear pants underneath. Plus, the dress was blue instead of black and "mom, witches wear black". Mom said it was dark out and no one would be able to tell it was blue. I specifically remember my mother pulling that dress right off the hanger out of her closet. I'm not sure if she bought that witch hat, or if we borrowed it. I hope we bought the plastic vampire teeth. No, I don't know why a witch has vampire teeth. Maybe I decided that'd be cool. Also, those aren't my real eyebrows. Just so you know. And don't worry, my blue funk only lasted for the first three houses.

If you're thinkin' homemade costumes were not the norm, here's a shot of my older brother and me with some neighborhood friends. I'm the mummy. I remember being worried people wouldn't know I was a girl. Mom put lipstick on me (she was always so accommodating of my pickiness). My brother is the furry, frightening monster behind me. What the what? Yikes. The fella on the far left must be a serial killer. They look like everyone else, right? Then we have a ball player and a hobo. Could we even get away with a hobo today? Hmmm...


Contrast that with today's Halloween. I must remember being dissatisfied with my costume options because I let my kids pick their costumes at the beginning of summer (so I have time to make, borrow or buy them). When they were too small to care though, I made them myself. I was a bit of an overachiever at first, but it was fun.

Robot with mini lights taped
to the inside of the box
spray-painted silver.

Plex from Yo Gabba Gabba
and my little lumber Jack.

You don't even want to
know how long it took to
make Steve from Minecraft.

Nowdays they've graduated to some store-bought (or Amazon Prime bought) options. Last year Ben was a "black blimp". Boy did we get the looks on that one. Jack wanted to be a ninja - easy enough. We bought Emma a Cinderella costume (from the movie) with butterfly decked glass slippers and all. At the last minute she decided to wear her Little Mermaid dress. Whatever. There'll be no argument from the unhappy witch about costume adjustments. Even Rob and I play dress up on Halloween for trick-or-treating. There sure are a whole lot of options for easy costuming today. Thanks internet!

The other big difference between then and now is that we don't live in a neighborhood now. Now we park in someone else's neighborhood and walk the kids around. I still have the same rules though - no eating candy while we're still out trick-or-treating. It's for different reasons though. I just don't want chocolaty fingerprints all over everything.

So Halloween is in 41 days (I just asked Google). We already have Emma's Sleeping Beauty dress, shoes and even gloves and purse. Jack has decided he wants to be the black blimp this year. Ben wanted to create his own character: Ben the Bunny. There was green fur and paper mache involved, so I actually declined. I hope there won't be any mental scarring involved in that decision. He decided on a black bodysuit looking costume from Walmart. It'll make him look like a shadow, so that's kinda Halloweeny. Not many more years left of trick-or-treating in the Shertzer Chateau. Gotta make them count!

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That Time The Internet (And My Husband) Saved My Life

You know when you feel really terrible and you go to the doctor, and they run some tests and they say nothing is wrong with you? Or they say your lab tests are normal, but you could be ____ and prescribe something that doesn't help at all and sometimes makes it worse? I do. I've been on this merry-go-round for 25 years. This is the story about how I finally figured out what was really going on with the help of my husband and the internet.

Healthy-ish, but starting to
lose some hair.

I think I was about 21 when I first noticed a bout of extreme fatigue. I remembered my Mom saying she was diagnosed hypothyroid while she was in college with the same symptoms. She encouraged me to go to the doctor. The doctor (a really nice young woman) ran some tests. She said everything was normal. And so nothing changed.

A few years later I was having problems with brain fog, extreme fatigue and feeling nauseated. I visited the University health center and the doctor there (a very nice older man) ran a 6 hour blood sugar test during which every hour I drank orange sugary tasting goo, had my blood drawn and gave a urine sample. He diagnosed me with "relative hypoglycemia". He said about 3 hours after I eat, my blood sugar drops. Mmmkay. I tried to eat more protein and not go without food for more than 3 hours. And nothing really changed.

A few years after that I noticed my hair was a whole lot thinner than it used to be. I went to yet another doctor (a somewhat full-of-herself woman). She said there was nothing wrong with me and that I should pay more attention to my nutrition. Probably true, but, again - nothing changed.

Another doctor a few years later again said everything was normal, but gave me a depression screening form to fill out. I was thinking "If I'm depressed, it's because I'm so freaking tired and everyone keeps telling me I'm normal"! She said the screen didn't reveal any depression issues, but gave me an antidepressant and an anti-anxiety medication to try. The anxiety one gave me the shakes. The antidepressant just turned off my desire to want to resolve anything. Not helpful.

Because my hair was extremely thin now to the point that people were asking me if I had cancer, I went to a dermatologist who did a scalp biopsy. The verdict? "Yes, your hair is getting thinner."  Umm... what? I don't need a confirmation, I need an answer. Why?!

Three kids, sooo tired.

By the time I had my children I was so zombified I could barely function. I have no idea how I found the willpower to force myself just to move so many times throughout the day. Stuff needed to get done. I didn't really have any choice.

But I was still tired. Somewhere in there I saw yet another doctor who told me I was normal and treated me a bit like I was crazy. Somewhere in there I got prescribed another anti-depressant by yet another doctor. Not. Helpful.

This year I started to have another bout of super-duper-extreme fatigue. I gained like 20 pounds in a month and I hadn't changed my eating habits. This time I was positive it was my thyroid. It had to be. I had all the symptoms and almost no hair left. I couldn't think straight, I was (and still am) tired all of the time. I was irritable, I was gaining weight. Help! Help! Help! This time when my lab results came back normal, I put my foot down. "Look" I said, "I've been dealing with this off and on for 25 years. If it isn't my thyroid, I need to know what it is. I don't care how many tests I have to take, or how bizarre they are. I just want to figure this out". My doctor was pretty great about it. He ordered a stress test, an asthma test, a sleep apnea test. Normal, normal, normal.

Meanwhile, my husband was also convinced it was my thyroid. He sent me an article about it. The article lead me to another article in which I found a list of deficiencies that can cause the thyroid not to work properly (10 Nutrient Deficiencies Every Thyroid Patient Should Have Checked). I marched into my next appointment armed with the list and insisted I be tested for everything on the list. One of the things on the list was iron. My doctor looked at my last labs and said "you're iron is fine, but we can run it again". At this point, the "you're crazy, lady" vibe just rolled off of me. Mostly.

Thankfully, they ran a ferritin test. I didn't even know what ferritin was. It turns out ferritin is the amount of stored iron in your body. And you need it. Mine was 4.5. Anything under 50 and you can develop insomnia (check). Anything below 40 causes hair loss (check). Anything under 70 and your hair won't regrow. Ugh! Optimal for women is between 70-90. There is no telling how long my ferritin has been this low.

Lots of scalp showing.

I also had an iodine deficiency. Who knew that was even possible today? When the nurse called with my results she said that I should put salt on my food. I already salt my food. I did some research and took some advice and bought some kelp tablets. I was also prescribed iron tablets twice daily.

By the third week after taking my iron and iodine, I noticed a slight improvement. I no longer had to lie down an hour after lunch. My labs 7 weeks later showed that my iodine was now in normal range, and my ferritin was up to 12.3. I expected it to go up faster, but hey - as long as it's going up!

I have not been checked for the MTHFR gene mutation. I have not been checked for gluten sensitivity which can inhibit iron absorption - but I can tell you that cutting out gluten cuts out a lot of my brain fog. I'm still working on figuring out the precise cause of my iron loss, but at least I have a plan for improvement now.

For anyone happening upon this article, I just want to list the common symptoms of iron deficiency and iodine deficiency. If you have these symptoms and your thyroid is normal (or even if it isn't), I want you to go get tested for all the things listed in the article above.

Iron deficiency symptoms:

• general fatigue
• weakness
• pale skin
• shortness of breath (air hunger)
• dizziness
• strange cravings to eat items that aren’t food, such as dirt, ice, or clay
• a tingling or crawling feeling in the legs (restless leg)
• tongue swelling or soreness
• cold hands and feet
• fast or irregular heartbeat
• brittle nails
• headaches

Iodine deficiency symptoms: 

• Lethargy and tiredness, muscular weakness and constant fatigue
• Feeling cold (even on warm days)
• Difficulty concentrating, slowed mental processes and poor memory
• Unusual weight gain
• Depression
• Thick puffy skin or puffiness of the face
• Hair loss
• Dry Skin
• Constipation
• Weak, slow heart beat
• Enlarged thyroid or goitre

Me and my mom.

There are also things that inhibit the absorption of iron and iodine.  Common iron inhibitors include tea, chocolate and caffeine (but vitamin C aids absorption). Common iodine inhibitors include vegetables in the cruciferous family such as broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts and kale.

Thankfully, my husband and research on the internet is leading me down the road to recovery. I know I sound dramatic in my title about how this has saved my life, but I suspect un-diagnosed anemia might be why my mother died at 54. Maybe her doctors never ran the right tests. Maybe years of a lack of iron or something else caused a slow decline until her body just couldn't take it anymore. If I had given up at my "normal" test results again, would I have had a heart attack and died in a few years too? I'm glad I won't have to find out.

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Who Is Your Soulmate?

When most people think of the word "soulmate" it conjures up ideas of a romantic partner. But more than that, a soulmate is usually thought of as someone who you are not complete without. When you meet that person, everything falls into place and you just know. It's magic. It's perfect. That kind of love transcends the ordinary. Right?

When I was in high school, my English teacher told the class how she used to believe that there was only one person for everyone. She said she used to worry that her soulmate would be on the other side of the world and she would never meet him. Then she shook her head with a nostalgic smile and said "but it's not like that". She said you just had to find someone whose faults you could live with.

Today, that makes perfect sense to me, but sitting in that classroom at 17 years old, my heart sank. Wait... what? No no no! There are soulmates! There have to be. I haven't met mine yet. I want my happily ever after! I decided she had just settled. She had given up. Not me though. Not me.

As a Past Life Regressionist, and having, well... lots of my own past life experiences (as well as present life ones), I have some new ideas about just what a soulmate is. I've seen a lot of the people from my current life in other rolls in other lives. My brother in this life was my father in another, and my son in yet another. An old boyfriend was my husband. My current husband was my husband in another life. On and on. You can read descriptions of some of my own personal regressions here: www.timetravelhypnosis.com/category/my-past-lives/

What you would expect, if your soulmate is really your soulmate throughout time, is to see them as your love partner in every life, right? But that doesn't seem to happen. So do soulmates exist?

I did a meditation on this very subject. Here's what I learned: There are soulmates, but soulmates are more of a vibrational alignment: a soul on the same level of learning and experience as you. In that sense, your closest soul match could be your child, your parent, your best friend. Heck, it could even be your dog! The romantic entanglement aspect is a creation of our human need to feel loved. A soulmate is unconditional love at a soul level, not at an Earth level. Not the character you're playing in this life.

And then there's this little gem I got from my higher self under hypnosis:

My question/statement:
I have read that people choose to incarnate together in romantic love relationships over and over again, every time.

The response:
That is the soul's choosing. You may choose that experience if you believe it helps you to learn. No one feels excluded by this choice. There is no exclusion. There is no negative emotion at source. There is love, there is support, there is gratitude. There is no jealousy, there is no "better than", there is no "more than". These concepts do not exist except on Earth... So you may choose the same partner for the Earth experience but it is a choice. It is not a necessity. You are aligned with all souls. There is no one soul you are meant to partner with in every life. There is no "other half". There is all others. You are soulmates with all other souls. You are the one. You are the ONE.


Wow. How 'bout that? All of us are soulmates?

That doesn't mean every relationship is our highest vibrational match. And we can work on being the version of ourselves we like the most in order to match the partner we'd like to have the most.

But maybe, just maybe, no matter who we choose to be romantically involved with, we are with our soulmate. Every time.

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